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J O K E   &   D A G G E R - March 5, 2007 Ted Various news wire services are circulating the unconfirmed accusation that Ted Saskin and his NHLPA gang were looking in on NHL player’s e-mail messages. We aren’t saying this has happened. But we are pleased to provide you with a few samples of what kind of comments Saskin might have read IF he did indeed eavesdrop on the players. (Note: Players names have been X’d out to protect the innocent. Also to protect the not so innocent. Mostly to protect us.) Comment 1: Hey Billy, I can’t wait to for the arbitrator to get that hearing going. Saskin will be out of the office a lot, and we can sneak in and download a picture of Bob Goodenow onto his computer as a screen saver. Signed XXXXXXX Comment 2: Hey George, I hear that Saskin is going to visit all the teams when they come to Toronto to play the Leafs. We should all put up giant life size posters of Chris Chelios in our dressing room just prior to Saskin’s arrival. I was thinking about a life size poster of Bettman too, but that would only by about 6 inches high. He might not even see it. Signed XXXXXXX Comment 3: Hey Mike, we lost a tough one in Dallas last night. We had a few pops back at the hotel and decided to send Saskin an e-mail from the Goal Judges Union. We told Ted that we need a new leader and understand he may soon be available. We told him that we wanted a leader that would cave in on all key negotiations and was aware that he has a lot of expertise in that area. For some strange reason he hasn’t written back yet. LOL Signed XXXXXXX Comment 4: Hey John. I see you guys have a playoff spot all locked up. I hope we can say the same soon. I understand that Saskin has decided he should be paid more salary than the union guys from the NFL and Major League Baseball get. I think we should send him a letter from Al Eagleson. The basic message would be “from one crook to another I salute your manipulation. Let’s get together soon.” Your pal, Al. Signed XXXXXXX Comment 5: Hey Pete, I see you made a few dandy saves against the Bruins last night. I doubt you’re in the mood to save Saskin’s job at the same time. I hear Ted hasn’t been home for dinner with his family in over a month. He spends all evening calling the guys, trying to drum up some support. From what I hear this is one drummer that can’t keep a beat. Signed XXXXXXX Now we at Hockey Spy.com aren’t sure if Saskin read these five supposedly confidential e-mails or not. But a letter he sent out to all the player’s this week is somewhat suspicious. Here’s the letter in question: Dear Player: Just a brief note to say hi from your good pal Ted. Just call me Teddy. I just wanted you to know I have a new feature on my computer that prevents outsiders from changing my screen saver images. When your team comes to Toronto I plan to visit you in your dressing room. As a favour I will plaster you dressing room walls with life size pictures of various Playboy bunnies. I hope you are enjoying the new collective bargaining agreement. It sure beats the crap out of the lousy deal that the Goal Judge Union negotiated for their guys. By the way, I saw a story in the paper about Al Eagleson selling all his memorabilia on an auction house website. I can’t stand that crook. I’d love to talk longer but I have to race home to have dinner with my family. Love and Kisses, Teddy

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